selfishness

do you believe that human are actually selfish? hm.. I think I have in somewhere.. erhm...

Just realize after family dinner.. hm... hm.. hmm..

hi....

ok.. industrial training is ending soon.. now im thinking whether I should end it by this week or next week... exhausted + a report is waiting for me to write.. Goddamit..
zzz... study life is coming.. a lot of my friends would be inpatient waiting the day to come.. but for me.. I want to stay in house.. enjoying being loved by my family..hehe..
erhm~ neways.. face the reality bah.. we need to gain new things everyday..haha~

P/s:try to convince my dad to buy me a little saga.. but now economic downturn.. so.. i guess .. it only appear in my dream. :(
erm.. "dear, i miss u" "dear, i love u" keep appear in my mind.. i dunno y..swt..~~~~~

hi....

zz

while you are trying to achieve perfectionist in your work, difficulties always along the way..bah. only overcome the difficulties den only u can be perfect..haiz..its ain't easy to satisfied your boss expectation toward you....

dairy? perhaps~

Today Mr pang called me upon industrial training. Erhm..I am very happy that I informed that no lecturer will be visiting me. muahah! but ah pang gives some excuse saying he is trying very hard to arrange lecturer to visit every student.. den he said.. u know la~ hundred over student, not every lecturer can take time to visit the site. bla bla bla.. so on~.. whatever lo~ In the end, I pass this training ok liao.. :)

After few months of working as an "engineer" in the site,haha~ few type of human attitude..

some worker blow water keep saying he know this and that.. but come to work he know nothing..
of course, some the other way round...

some "zzz" work for few years di.. do the same thing also can do wrongly..really "zzz"

some I would classified them as betrayer especially those educated 1.. look friendly with you.. but they are backstabber.. really son of a b*tch~ just get to know his faces recently after knew him for few months.. god damn it!

some which I like the most.. they are quite, they don't talk much..but once come to work they look expert.. they know what exactly they need to do.. no need to keep supervise them..ahha~ maybe they look familiar with my characteristic gua~


ok~ 2nd part~

well, I told you that I have been prepare for proposing right? sad to say I have been rejected by the girl. She said her heart is with another guy wo~ so.. I have been emo for I guess.. A week gua.. I guess I let this feel fade away very fast..

hmm~ yesterday, she smsed me as I did not msg her for few days and I am trying to make myself busy to let it feeling go asap through work.. yeah! haha..
After hours of thinking.. I have been thinking about why not delisted her in my friend list as I can recover faster , etc etc etc~~~

den I come up with.. nvm la~ sms wif her nothing wrong and my feeling toward her is also start fading liao.. Now just need to make sure that there is always a "full stop" (limit) in between me and her den ok liao.. :)


P/s: bah.. I guess I not really know how to make friends gua.. I not really good in start conversation with friends. therefore, I seldom contact my friends. So.. Suddenly I think that my friends around me should be thinking that I am a person who is gonna find friends when I need help bah... "swt" .. what to do~ quiet person is like that ge la~
whatever la.. human thought is something beyond that we can control. let it be~

December

Haha! this is the last month of the industrial training..really wish the training will end as soon as possible. Now having terrible waist pain (terseliuh). chamz..
Hmm.. In msn, saw a lot of ppl having some really good mood because december. Christmas is coming! merry Christmas!

miserable

zz.. no need to un what I write.. just some self thought


Why my life is more sadness than happiness? maybe because I have a negative mind. haha~ think wurt also think negatively bah...that's y i am quiet.. less talk = less mistake from mouth to mouth poison.remain neutral on all the gossip..haha..EXCEPT FOR THE BN GOVERNMENT.. which I will curse them. stupid malay around in government agency :)


Today I went out with my schoolmates, they were start talking about future and salary. One of my friend was during vios. haha~ well.. I really envy.. coz I wanted to have a car very much but I not afford to have.
while we were chatting, my friends said hey wei hao I nvr visit your house before. When can I visit? (something like that la). haha.. so scary.. so scare they come my house le... well u knw la.. gossip (for those who know me.. I almost lost a good friend because of this during serene birthday at sg long). zzz..i just wanted to things from my own hand..maybe this words suitable for me.. I like to stay low profile..haha~ dun wan to say la...haiz..

zz

Today my heart is very pain... have been thinking a lot about her. I guess my self-esteem have been decreased a lot. A problem wish can easily be settle but I am not dare to make the first move. maybe because of that I might loose a chance to have her to my side... There is a major problem in between me and her. She's still missing her ex. Well, I know if I made the first move , I believe I can make her fade her miss toward her ex with my kindness and my caring. No doubt I can be very caring and kind sometimes..which leads to high jealousy and den.. lead to break up in my past relationship. "jealousy" spoils twice of my lovely relationship.

because of this.. I have been thinking .. am I suitable/ready for starting a new relationship? am I?
I asked myself, hey, you are nothing now.. career? lol..uncertain.. financial? going to owe government 60k.. so having a gf.. gonna spend a lot .. if break up means all the hard work you made that far = "bye" never ever will be back agian...so.. is that worth? "break up" is a word that not everyone can withstand with. It really need big encouragement to overcome it to get your normal life back.. am I really ready for it? hmm.. now deli-dali (delay) really no good.. really need 1 shot~haha..
but I guess I know what i am going to choose.. I have been thinking too much I guess..:)